


Oh my Akashi, he is not dead

by Chrystie, kate882



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Angel!Kuroko, M/M, Tumblr Prompt, UnderworldRuler!Takao, god!akashi, reaper!Aomine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-10
Updated: 2015-12-10
Packaged: 2018-05-06 01:31:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5397824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chrystie/pseuds/Chrystie, https://archiveofourown.org/users/kate882/pseuds/kate882
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For the prompt: you’re a grim reaper and i’m a guardian angel. we’re assigned to the same human and you keep insisting that their time is up when i’m telling you it’s not.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Oh my Akashi, he is not dead

Aomine held his medium sized scythe high over his next victim’s head as a truck approached Kagami from the end of the street. Aomine was ready to claim his life and bring his soul in. He was particularly excited about this certain kill. This job was going to be his last before his next scythe upgrade to the full sized version instead of his current arm sized one. He swung down towards his victim’s neck just as the truck was almost upon him, and was stopped by what looked to be a sword. “What the fuck?!” He turned stunned eyes to whatever or whoever that it was stopping him. The truck passed by Kagami without even giving him a single scratch.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Kuroko demanded, arms and wings spread out in front of Kagami in a protective gesture, eyes narrowed into a glare at the reaper before him.

“My job. What the hell do you think you’re doing?”Had it been any other situation, Aomine would have appreciated how attractive the angel in front of him was. But at the moment the angel was currently standing in the way of his promotion, so the angel’s hot ass had to be ignored until after he got out of the way.

“This is my charge, and he’s not supposed to die yet, so you’re not doing your job correctly.” Kuroko replied, hesitantly moving his arms to cross over his chest, but kept a careful eye on the reaper to make sure that he didn’t try anything, wings still spread out to block Kagami.

“Yes he is.” Aomine pulled out a scroll that was attached to his belt to show the angel, “See!” he pointed towards Kagami’s name.

Kuroko pulled out another scroll. “And here it says that I’m still supposed to be watching him, which means he isn’t dying.”

“Well maybe you’re over staying your time ‘cause this guy’s dying!” Aomine jabbed a finger in the direction Kagami was, or at least where he last was before he unknowingly walked away from his death. Aomine stared at the empty spot Kagami once stood, dumbfounded, “Where the hell did he go? I just want to kill him!”

“I told you, I’m not letting you kill him.” Kuroko turned his back on the reaper, starting to walk in the direction of Kagami’s house to catch up with him.

“Well, he’s gotta die at some point, and according to this list, that’s today!” Aomine exclaimed following Kuroko to find the stupid red head.

“According to mine, it’s not!” Kuroko snapped back.

“Well one of our instruction lists is wrong and I’m pretty fucking sure it’s not mine. Your little redheaded asshole is supposed to die today from being hit by a truck while running away from a puppy!”

Well, that certainly sounded like Kagami. “Too bad. He’s not dying. Take it up with the higher ups.”

“Fuck you, yes he is! He’s gonna die and I’m gonna get my promotion!” Aomine continued to follow Kuroko as he walked through the front door of an apartment only to find the apartment empty. “How do you not know where your charge was headed today?”

“Because he was texting someone when you decided to come along, so he probably made plans as we were arguing.” Kuroko sighed after one more look around and decided to try Maji Burger as his next best bet.

“Well, he wouldn’t be having those plans if you just let me do my job,” Aomine grumbled as he childishly crossed his arms across his chest. He just wanted to get this stupid death over with so he could get his new gigantic scythe, but apparently Akashi hated him.

“He should be having those plans because of my job.” Kuroko countered, not even sparing Aomine a glance. “Kuroko Tetsuya, by the way. It looks like we’ll be spending some time together, so we might as well know each other’s names.”

Aomine stayed stubbornly silent for a few minutes of walking before relenting with a sigh, “Aomine Daiki.” Even though he was very annoyed at Kuroko for stopping him from killing his target, he still unabashedly and openly stared at Kuroko’s ass as he walked behind him, following him towards the next possible place his target could be. His ass _was_ really nice.

“Interesting to meet you, Aomine-kun.” Kuroko replied, relaxing a bit when he spotted Kagami through the Maji Burger window.

“Yeah… I guess I could say the same.” Aomine eyed Kagami through the window, very tempted to just go in and take his life so he could just leave, but he knew Kuroko would stop him before he got very far. Aomine watched as a ridiculously attractive blond guy bounded over towards Kagami and plopped down right next to him, practically clinging to him. “Is he on a date?!” Aomine exclaimed, “How the hell did you not know your charge was going on a _date?!”_

Kuroko tilted his head, observing the scene. “I don’t think my charge knew he was on a date.” He decided.

Judging by Kagami’s flustered actions and red face, Aomine figured Kuroko was probably right. “Well at least the dude who’s into him is pretty hot. Not sure what he sees in him though.”

“That’s Kise Ryouta. He’s a model here.” Kuroko told Aomine.

“Then I really don’t understand. What the hell does he see in him?” The couple got up with Kise practically wrapped around Kagami’s arm and walked out of the Maji Burger, Kagami’s embarrassed voice becoming louder as they approached the exit.

“You could’ve told me this was a date, Kise.” Kagami was sure his face matched his hair at this point.

“But you might not have come if I said that, so I had to make sure I told you when you could see me, and that I would look extra good so that you’d agree.” Kise explained.

Kagami kept his eyes glued to the sidewalk as he responded in a mutter, “I wouldn’t have said no if you’d told me.”

Kise’s eyes lit up. “You wouldn’t have?” If possible, he was clinging even closer to Kagami.

“N-no.” Kagami shook the arm Kise was hanging off of slightly to try and get him to loosen his grip, “Loosen up a bit, will ya? We’re still in public.”

“We can be not in public if you want.” Kise said suggestively.

“I-if you want to, I don't mind but maybe not yet.” He kept his gaze resolutely on the ground in front of him, unsure if he wanted to meet Kise’s eyes at the moment.

“Ugh. If they go back home to fuck I’ll definitely stop following him around for a while.” Aomine did not want to watch the odd couple having sex no matter how much he wanted to kill Kagami. His eyes widened in amusement as a thought crossed his head, “Hey, what if I just said fuck the truck and kill him while he’s banging the blonde? That’d be hilarious!”

“You're not doing that.” Kuroko said flatly.

“Why not?! He gets to go out getting laid and I get my promotion! It’s a fucking win-win!” Aomine was tempted to see if he could just outrun the stupid angel and kill Kagami right now. It was very possible that Aomine was faster than Kuroko on foot, but he had no way of knowing how fast Kuroko flew.

“I don't know if that's a win for him since he's asexual. He'd only be doing it for Kise-kun.” Kuroko told Aomine.

“Akashi fucking dammit! Just lemme kill him so I can leave!” Aomine just wanted his fucking promotion! Why did a hot angel have to stand in his way?!

“No. We’ll talk to Akashi.” Kuroko replied, idea forming from Aomine’s words.

Aomine paled slightly, “Do we have to?” He didn't get along with Akashi very well, even if he was God of Earth.

“Yes we have to. There isn't any other way to sort this out since one of our lists is wrong.”

“Can't we just say yours is wrong?” Aomine would almost rather spend an hour with his boss than see Akashi.

Kuroko narrowed his eyes. “Are you afraid of Akashi-kun? I'm sure he'd be glad to know that . . .”

“More like I just don’t like him. He’s kinda hard to get along with.” The last time Aomine had spoken to Akashi, which had been a good century ago, Akashi looked like he was ready to rip his head off by the end of their meeting, not that the feeling wasn’t mutual.

“Then you can deal with it.” Kuroko replied. “We need to sort this out.”

Aomine groaned the whole way back to Upperworld and only managed to to get grumpier when he and Kuroko were told they had to wait to see Akashi and were directed to the waiting room. “Dude, I just wanted a promotion, why did I have to run into you and your hot ass?”

Kuroko’s eyebrows rose at that. “I beg your pardon?”

“I wanted a promotion and your hot ass is in the way?” Was Aomine not clear enough? It sounded pretty clear to him.

“What does my attractiveness have to do with the situation?” Kuroko asked, furrowing his eyebrows.

“It doesn’t? I’m just saying you’re hot and I’d totally do you _but_ you also kinda killed my day.” Aomine poked at the crease between Kuroko’s brows, “Stop thinking so much about it. They’re two separate points. I’m just thinking about both of them.”

Kuroko pushed Aomine’s finger away from his forehead. “Better I kill your day than you kill my charge and find out your list was wrong.”

Aomine smirked towards Kuroko, “Then you wanna unkill it and let me grope that hot ass?”

“In the middle of a waiting room while you're hoping to kill my charge? No.”

“How about tonight when all this shit is solved then? And nothing personal against the guy. Still was just doing my job.”

Kuroko rolled his eyes. “Buy me a milkshake and we’ll see.”

Aomine arched a brow in mild confusion, “A milkshake? Like the thick human drink-dessert thing?” He didn’t know too much about human foods past the ones he ate from time to time which limited his knowledge of human foods to burgers, pizza and popcorn. He only vaguely knew what a milkshake was because they sold them where he usually got burgers from.

“Exactly like that. Vanilla.” Kuroko confirmed.

“Well… There’s a place that sells burgers that I like that also sells milkshakes. We can call that a first date if it makes you more comfortable with the fact that I’m gonna be all over you the minute we have this stupid Kagami thing dealt with.”

Kuroko nodded in agreement. “Alright then. We have a date.” He offered a tiny smile.

“Sweet!” At least something was going right today.

A message sounded over the PA system telling them that Akashi was ready to see them. Aomine wasn’t really sure whether to be glad that he was one step closer to ending this dumb fight or be annoyed that he was going to have to see Akashi.

At the sight of Kuroko, Akashi’s lips naturally pulled into a small smile. “Tetsuya. It's always nice to see one of my most trusted angels. What can I do fo-” Akashi cut himself off at the sight of Aomine and almost had to surprises an annoyed groan. “I see. What did Daiki do _this_ time?”

“I didn't do jackshit! You gotta let some things go!” This was exactly why Aomine hated seeing Akashi. The guy was an asshole.

“The last time you had to come in and see me, you had killed a man and set off a civil war. That's not something I'm going to forget easily.”

“I was doing my job! I was told to kill him!” Technically that made it either Akashi’s or Aomine's overly hyper boss, Takao’s, fault so Aomine found his blame completely misdirected.

“Well, there seems to be another mix up. Aomine-kun’s list says that he is supposed to kill my charge today, but mine says I'm still watching him.” Kuroko explained.

Akashi’s brows knit together, “That's certainly odd.” He made a small wave of his hand and in it appeared a folder with Kagami's face pasted on the front. Giving the contents a quick scan he found the problem. “Kagami Taiga is certainly supposed die on this date but not for another fifty five years. Did Kazunari happen to give you the wrong instructions?”

“I dunno. Why don’t you call him and ask?” No way was Aomine going to sit through a phone call with Takao if he already had to see Akashi.

Akashi hesitated to agree. He knew that calling Takao in this situation was the best course of action but talking to him was usually more than Akashi liked to handle. With a resigned sigh, he made another wave of his hand causing a circular cloud to rise up and display Takao on it.

“Sei-chan! You don't call often. What's happening?” Takao asked. “Ohh, and you've got Tet-chan and Aho-chan with you!”

Akashi could already feel a headache coming on and he hadn’t even said anything to Takao yet. He would just have to try to keep the conversation short, even if he knew Takao would most likely try to draw it out. “Daiki was mistakenly assigned to kill a man who’s not set to die for another five decades. Please explain to me why.”

“Who was it?” Takao asked curiously, looking at Aomine with a judging expression.

“Hey! Don’t start blaming me! You gave me the stupid list, I just followed it! The asshole’s name was Kagami...something.”

“Huh?” Takao opened up a file that had suddenly appeared. “No . . . definitely not supposed to die. And he’s supposed to reincarnate when he dies, so he’s not the underworld’s problem anyway. Someone on Sei-chan’s end fucked up.”

“As crude as the way you put it, you are unfortunately right. It’s possible it might also be Chihiro’s mistake.” Akashi sent out a quick message for Mayuzumi to come to his office.

“What do you want?” Mayuzumi asked, appearing in the office. He took a look around at the people in there and looked like he was about to simply leave again.

“Don’t leave just yet.” Akashi knew Mayuzumi wouldn’t want to stay in the present company for more than he had too. Granted, with the exception of Kuroko, Akashi wouldn’t want to stay with any of the people present either. “Did you happen to give the wrong date of death for Kagami Taiga to Kazunari the last time you delivered him the names? There was a mix up with him almost killed five decades too early.”

Mayuzumi made an IPAD appear and scrolled through it until he found the name they were talking about. “Looks like it. Sorry about that.” He didn’t look or sound sorry at all.

“I’m sure you are,” Akashi commented dryly. “I think it’s only fair that I come up with a punishment for you, and usually in this type of situation I would demote someone, however your position is too important to do such a thing and there is currently no one capable enough to replace you. Therefore I think it would be a fair punishment to sentence you to spending a week with Kazunari.”

“I don’t even want that.” Takao said, shooting an uncomfortable look at Mayuzumi, who was looking at him like he was planning a different death now.

“Not happening.” Mayuzumi said flatly.

“Well he works under you as well, Kazunari. You can have him do as you please,” Akashi waved off Takao’s complaint while blatantly ignoring Mayuzumi’s.

“No, no, I’m good. I’ve got a PA.” He yanked Imayoshi over, who looked less than thrilled. “I don’t need him for a week. Please don’t. Stick him with Aho-chan.”

“Has anyone killed a reaper before? Asking for a friend.” Mayuzumi looked at Aomine cold enough to send a shiver down his spine.

“Chi-chan doesn’t have friends.” Takao said helpfully.

“Nah, I’m okay with Kuroko.” Mayuzumi said, still glaring at Aomine.

“I think I rather spend a week hugging a cactus than with this guy.” Aomine had only met Mayuzumi a handful of times and, needless to say, they never went well.

“The feeling is mutual.” He turned to Akashi. “I mean, you _could_ have me hang out with them, but then I could also tell Furihata about that time in Rome back in it’s early empire days. . .”

Akashi blanched. The early days was when he was still getting used how humans functioned and human nature in general. Needless to say, it wasn’t the best time on his track record. His eyes narrowed at Mayuzumi, “You wouldn’t.”

“Try me.” He said, narrowing his eyes right back, the IPAD changing into a cellphone with Furihata’s number pulled up.

With an exasperated groan Akashi put a hand up telling Mayuzumi to stop. “Fine, fine. You have to stay in the States for a week instead.”

Mayuzumi didn’t look thrilled, but he let the phone disappear. He could hang out with Nijimura in the States. That wouldn’t be too bad. They could bitch about Akashi together or something.

“Now, if that’s everything, I would like all of you to leave my office now. Immediately.” Akashi silently commended himself for not just forcing all of them out with a large gust of wind. Without sparing Takao a glance, Akashi waved his arm to end his call with him, letting the cloud float away.

Mayuzumi didn’t need to be told twice. He was already gone before Akashi’s sentence was even finished.

“It was nice to see you again, Akashi-kun.” Kuroko said, heading towards the door.

Aomine happily followed Kuroko out wrapping an arm around Kuroko’s shoulders just as he walked out the door.

Akashi practically collapsed in his chair, running a hand over his face in stress. He paged his PA once he was sure the bunch was fully gone. “Reo, tell Kouki to come by my office for the next few hours?”

“Sure thing.” Reo replied cheerfully.

* * *

Once out of Akashi’s office, Aomine held no reservations of making his intentions clear. “So, should we go on that date first or do you wanna go back to your place for a bit of fun before our date?”

“I need to check on Kagami-kun first, and then we can go on the date.” Kuroko answered.

“Do you _have_ to?” Aomine whined, “We already know he’s not gonna die. He should be fine.”

“I take my job seriously, Aomine-kun.”

“Apparently.” Aomine half dejectedly followed Kuroko back to Kagami, who was in the middle of a movie with Kise cuddled up to his side, the armrest in between them lifted up. “They look fine to me, let’s go.”

“You’re an impatient person.” Kuroko observed.

“Only when it comes to important things like you and me on a date or in your room.” Aomine was almost jealous of Kagami purely for the fact that he was actually on his date while he was stuck watching it.

“Well then, I suppose we should get going.” Kuroko said, holding out his hand.

“Hell yes!” Aomine took Kuroko’s hand, ready to head to the closest Maji Burger.

Kuroko laughed and let himself be lead out of the theater.


End file.
